today, honestly, i just feel like shit.

melby has been sleeping a small chunk at the beginning of the night (mostly while i'm still awake) and then is waking up every 45 minutes. she goes back down easily, but sleeping for maybe 30 minutes at a time really isn't resulting in my most glamorous and rested self.

i am exhausted and do not feel my usual level of rationalized hopeful.

i tried to do a small yoga flow while she napped her 25 second nap and couldn't even collect myself that long. i tried to nap during her later 30 second nap but couldn't relax.

and my solution to feeling like crap is eating crap, which in turn makes me feel and look like more crap. i feel totally out of control, depleted, and hopeless.

i am a mess, people.

and that's all i've got today.